Seasons of Life

I had the pleasure of having lunch with a former student today. Her name is Grace and it describes her perfectly. Along the way God allows you to join the journey of special people and Grace is one of those people! She graduated a year early from UT Austin and will be going overseas as a missionary to Italy (tough place, huh?). I am so proud of her. We joked a little at lunch how sending your personal thoughts out into cyberspace is so easy so here goes....

I got in my car from lunch and felt so blessed at hearing Grace's story. I remember those college/single days when it was you and God ALL the time. If you wanted to stay up till 2 am reading your Bible you could. If you wanted to take a day and sit by the lake and think about God you could. God was so PRESENT and your time with Him was often. Marriage seemed to change things...time with God was still special but now you had another human being to spend time with and typically you were up till 2 am with your husband! Motherhood changes things even more...and multiple children changes things A LOT!

Here comes my honesty...sometimes motherhood is a desert. You are so consumed with diapers, feeding little ones, picking up toys, doing laundry, staying emotionally balanced that God is...well, where is He? Of course He's present but it looks different. Church is like a breath of fresh air (free childcare, woohoo!) and sitting in service (with no little voices breaking in) in so peaceful. I am SO excited to be in His presence. At home I am so busy and so tired by 8 pm that I literally fall into bed and don't think twice. Listening to Christian music in my car (when I can convince Jake that we really don't need to listen to Elmo this time) is amazing. I sing, I focus, I pray. As soon as the car door opens the focus is lost on keeping up with diaper bags and surviving the Texas heat. I mourn the days of God-time all the time. I know this is a season and one day, when the kids are grown and gone, that time will be mine again (let's not go there yet because that is scary and means I will be very old).

I love my Savior. I love the gift of my 2 precious boys and amazing husband. Even though I whine I love the chaos and excitement that comes with a full house. But sometimes my desert seems very dry and I long for the refreshing drink of a day with Jesus.